Bicycle Store

The Illiterate Cyclist

Kooky Bicycle Service/Repair, Parts, Accessories, and SAG Support.

Building our area a better bike shop and cycling community one rickety step at a time.



Come Visit
(Please, Only Call During Hours Listed)

Mon-Tues-Thurs-Fri: 10am - 8pm
Wed:  Closed
Sat: 10am - 5pm
Sun: 11am - 5pm


A Little Background Noise

15 year Veteran of the Bike Industry going it alone to offer the Detroit Metro area and beyond the best and most comprehensive bike service I can. I have run many bike shops across the country, lead multi-store service departments, been a Rep in the Recumbent world (we're not talking about it), a wheel builder, suspension tech, Inside and Outside Territory Manager for a few bicycle parts distributors, a Dealer Account Coordinator for helping shops globally build their repertoire for their local consumer needs, a multi-time organizer of Cranksgiving events, and highly proud to be a SAG Mechanic for Make-A-Wish Michigan and the WAM300 ride. I have been across the country quite a bit, but the Detroit area is where I want to lay the groundwork for supporting our bike community with the best mechanical support they deserve. Please see my Services section to get a better grasp. Also, please follow my often maniacal ramblings on Instaham @theilliteratecyclist or weekly updates on Facebook.



There Can Be Only One


Balthazar Impresario

What's in a name?

Seem's people are either offended by the company name, or find it goofy and get a bit confused.  But, there's a story in it all.  I had an idea about 10 or 11 years ago that if I were to open my own shop one day, it would more-so be in a larger urban area, catering to the Commuters and Fixter types (Bipster?).  A hip, eclectic shop that was at its core a 100% reliable service driven shop, with the parts and accessories an actual cyclist would want.  And maybe carry a small, unique bike brand or two, like State, Fairdale, or Pure Cycles.  At the same time, I read a book every other month.  So, why not incorporate a used book store into it?  Hence,  The Illiterate Cyclist.  A place an every-person could come and get their mental and physical fix!  Where are books?  Hey, things cost money! 

As Balthazar Impresario, one of the last of the great Stage Show Runners; here comes the curtain call, time to rattle the boards one last time.

Repair Menu

Be it a proper bike tune-up, more singular and basic tweeks, custom wheel builds, suspension overhauls, and beyond; The Illiterate Cyclist has you covered.  Taking the Middle-Man out of the equation and by dedicating to the origins of a bike shop, The Service, allows me to offer you a better price, faster turn-around, and guaranteed, better results...because that's what I am known for.  

Disclaimer:  The Illiterate Cyclist does not support any throttle driven bicycles.  And, I don't sell Schwinn's, nor do I buy them.

Meat N' Potatoes Tune ($70)

Everything You Need, Nothing You Don't

Gear Adjustments, Brake Adjustments, Wheel Truing, Bearing Adjustments Where Applicable, Bike Cleaning, Cable and Housing Lubrication, Lite Chain Cleaning and Lubrication, Greasing Of Touch-Points, and General Safety Check and Bolt Torque.  Parts extra.

Kitchen Sink Services

Ala-Carte Labor

  • Tire/Tube Change ($10), 

  • Front and Rear Gear or Brake Adjustment ($20) 

  • New Cable and Housing Install with Adjustment ($15 per Brake/Shifter)

  • Hub Overhaul Clean N' Grease ($20)

  • Bottom Bracket Overhaul or Install ($20)

  • Wheel True ($20) 

  • Custom Wheel Build ($60 per Wheel)

  • Hydraulic Brake Bleed ($20 per Brake)

  • Suspension Overhaul ($25Rear/$50Front)

  • Custom Bike/Frame Build ($140)

  • Accessory Install ($10 per)

* Ask about anything else not listed.

Bits N' Bobs


  • Bought a bike online, and need to get it built, tuned, and prepped to be safe and secure...($60/Boxed Bike Build).

  • The Illiterate Cyclist is a new and growing business on a thread-bare budget.  We will be bringing in a good mix of parts and accessories to fill out the shop and offer the what's and wears you and your bike needs for your adventures.  As an actual cyclist myself, I assuredly stock products I can stand behind, and have product catalogs to get you so much more than you see.

  • SAG Support

    • Make-A-Wish Michigan's WAM300 Bike Tour

    • Bike Dearborn Open Streets

    • The Illiterate Cyclist's Cranksgiving

    • Monroe Cycling Club's Lake Erie Fall Classic

    • and beyond!  Contact me about your cycling event...if the cause is good, I'm likely interested!


Tune-Up:  With A Side of Good Deeds

Proceeds Towards Make-A-Wish Michigan

The Summer of WAM Special! 

Over the past few Summer's the Annual Wish-A-Mile 300 Bike Tour from TC down to Marshall has been the highlight of my year. A weird work vacation where I get up at 3 am, find myself wrenching in darkened parking lots an hour later, with just the best cast of characters I could ask for, and maybe get to bed at 11 pm...and then be ready to start over for the next day's journey. I believe we'd be going on the 34th year of the event this July, but then the World started falling apart. On average this generates $2.2 Million to go towards granting hundreds of Wishes each year for children, brave children, suffering from often incurable diseases that most strong adults couldn't burden. Now, the wishes can be as simple as a vacation trip to Disney World, a puppy (a freakin' puppy was purchased along the tour last year, folks), or something more selfless. Take Team Alex, who's namesake came from a young boy in the early 90's, who's wish was for a TV PSA to run on TV. The message was that if you saw a child suffering, in pain, in need of positivity; that you do the simplest thing of not looking away, but to give them a smile, just to show them that in their plight, people do care about them. And, in general, these wishes are to create memories for them and especially their families to keep with them after the potential of a life taken far too soon.

What am I doing, now that WAM is formally cancelled, and riders are struggling to garner donations in a more singular capacity in a virtual sense amid a far more cash strapped and weakened World? Exactly what Balthazar Impresario would do. My Meat N' Potatoes Tune is as standard $70, and is very comprehensive. Generally, as is, it's less expensive and better done than most anyone else's performance oriented tune in the area; because, as Ron Swanson said, "I know what I'm about, Son." So, if you opt for The Summer of WAM Special, the dollar amount now goes up to $100, but I split that 50/50 with Make-A-Wish Michigan through Aug. 16. At that point you are only paying $10 more than the "others" price, but you know a good chunk is going towards a very positive cause. Think about it, 20 repairs like that equates to $1000 towards the cause; and then I still can potentially keep the shop solvent (I hope). There can still be light at the end of this tunnel!

So, Ryan Reynolds, your PSA was great and all for MAW the other month; but, as I put it to the Avengers cast in a couple videos last July, "Come at me!"

#makeawishmichigan #WAMTour20 #theilliteratecyclists #ryanreynolds#supportyourbikeshop #ridejahbike


Contact Us


33423 Ford Rd, Garden City, MI  48135






33423 Ford Rd, Garden City, MI  48135

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